In the midst of new routines, I am trying to write. This five minute Friday exercise feels like doing planks. I hate it but I know it's good for me and it won't last too long. So here we go.... The prompt: Ready
She is about to lose her first tooth. I'm not ready. Who knew a person could well up over calcium?! It makes my heart ache to know that once it's under her pillow waiting for that sweet reward this will happen over and over again. I'm not ready. I look at pictures of her at birth, two and three and I think where did that time go? Everyone says, "It goes by too fast." EVERYONE. In the grocery store. In the Starbucks line. I smile and agree. But it's not until I see that tooth, wiggly and dangling that I lose my wits and realize how fast this time has gone.
In mere weeks she will look different and never have a mouth full of baby teeth again. And, that's what hurts the most. It's like this physical reminder I will see every morning that time is fleeting. That days are short. That minutes are precious.
So, I wait with her patiently as she presses her tongue to it to work it on out and I work out in my own spirit the tension between grief and joy...all at the same time.
Her growing is beautiful and she brings more life to our lives every new day. But this mama heart aches as her baby steps up and grows up.
There is still so much to teach her, so much to show her and the clock is ticking. May I be aware and not waste.
Stop. Five minutes are up.